Saturday, May 10, 2014

So long, but still...

Its been more than a year from the dark days that I had been going through
The struggles, the lies, the role-play and so on
Just to keep myself out of the water but still not helping
But fortunately, I had came over (but it doesn't)

I like feeding myself some drugs that keeping myself happy (not real drugs, I'm not even touching alcohol)
Play crazy, acts funny, stay strong for someone
But things do not turned up like what I was expected
Those silly acts seems doesn't work for me anymore
The prince and princess dream was just broken on my face
Things are started to grow out of my way, out of my capability

It could be the reason that I am getting elder and elder from year to year
Things that going to face are getting even harder to expect
I would like to find someone to share with
Someone that could give a shoulder to while I am needed
Is there anyone?!

I am keep telling to the others that I am really fine with single
But behind the people, I'm still wishing there is someone for me

So long, but still waiting
For you to even turn back to have a look
Thought that I've been over you
So, that's you the reason to pull me back into those deep dark thoughts
And till now only I realize, that I couldn't get you out of my mind

But I trying my best to tell myself
That "Life still goes on, time doesn't wait"
Although as others say things will be fine eventually
But this eventually seems last eternally

Hope it ends at somehow in the future
So that I could sleep well at every night
Do not need any distraction to against these stupid thoughts
and make me stay alive while I'm alone
Cause these feels killing me.

p/s: These are just some spilling out in an insomnia night

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